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:. Quotes .:

  • Bond :-: "Moneypenny, Fairbanks....."
  • Moneypenny :-: "Alaska!"
  • Bond :-: "No, Bill Fairbanks 002"
  • Moneypenny :-: "Oh poor Bill. I miss him"
  • Bond :-: "The man with the golden gun didn't"
  • Moneypenny :-: "Officially, that was never confirmed"
  • Bond :-: "Where was 002 when it happened?"
  • Moneypenny :-: "Beirut, 69?, in a cabaret with a lady called Saida"
  • Bond :-: "Beirut, hmmmm.... Moneypenny you are better than a computer"
  • Moneypenny :-: "In all sorts of ways! But you never take advantage of them"


  • Lazar :-: "My relationship with a client, Mr. Bond, is strictly confidential, like a doctor or a priest"
  • Bond :-: "Of course, yet you make guns for fingerless hoodlums, bullets for assassins"
  • Lazar :-: "Mr. Bond, bullets do not kill, it is the finger that pulls the trigger"
  • Bond :-: "Exactly....I'm now aiming precisely at your groin. So speak or forever hold your piece"
  • Lazar :-: "I have never seen Mr. Scaramanga!"
  • Bond :-: "On a cost per bullet basis he must be your best customer"
  • Lazar :-: "That is true, but unfortunately he seems only to fire them occasionally!"
  • Bond :-: "When was the last shipment?"
  • Lazar :-: "Mr. Bond this is impossible, I can not....!!"
  • Bond :-: (Bond fires a shot that misses Mr. Lazar's groin by an inch)
    "You're quite right....an inch too low!"


  • Bond :-: "Sorry about that darling! It was Hip! There's still no sign of Hai Fat. Every inquiry gets a polite Oriental brush off"
  • Waiter :-: (A waiter approaches holding a bottle of wine)
    "With the compliments....."
  • Bond :-: "Phu-yuck?!"
  • Waiter :-: "74', sir!"
  • Bond :-: (Bond and Goodnight tastes the wine)
    "I approve!"
  • Goodnight :-: "You do?!"
  • Bond :-: "Oh... not the wine. Your frock. Tight in all the right places....not too many buttons...!"
  • Goodnight :-: "Standard uniform for South East Asia. The buttons are down the back!"
  • Bond :-: "Designed by Q no doubt. One of them is a suicide-pill, I suppose?"
  • Goodnight :-: "No, but the bottom one has a homer in it!"
  • Bond :-: "How original"


  • JW :-: "Nowww, I know you. You're that secret agent, that English secret agent, from England!"


  • Hi-Fat's servant :-: (Scaramanga have just shot Hai Fat in his own home. Fat's servant comes running)
    "What happened?"
  • Scaramanga :-: "Mr. Fat has just resigned. I'm the new chairman of the board"
    (Scaramanga walks outside and spots the mausoleum)
    He always did like that mausoleum. Put him in it!"


  • Scaramanga :-: "You must admit Mr. Bond, I'm now undeniably the man with the golden gun!!"


  • Scaramanga :-: "You see Mr. Bond, like every great artist I want to create an indisputable masterpiece once in my lifetime. The death of 007 mano en mano, face to face, will be mine"
  • Bond :-: "You mean stuffed and displayed over your rocky mantelpiece?"
  • Scaramanga :-: "That's an amusing idea but I was thinking in terms of history"


  • Scaramanga :-: "A duel between titans......my golden gun against your Walter PPK!"
  • Bond :-: "One bullet against my six?!"
  • Scaramanga :-: "I only need one, Mr. Bond!!"


  • Bond :-: "I've never killed a midget before, but there can always be a first time!"
  • Nick Nack :-: "Oh, monsieur!"


  • Goodnight :-: (JB and Goodnight lay down on the bed, kissing. Bond stops as he sees a phone rise, just next to the bed)
    "What's the matter?"
  • Bond :-: "Something came up!"
    (Bond picks up the reciever)
    "Hello?"
  • M :-: "Ah, there you are Bond...Well done. Congratulations!"
  • Bond :-: "Thank you, sir"
  • M :-: "Is Miss Goodnight with you? I would like a word with her..."
  • Bond :-: "Hold on, sir"
    (Bond starts kissing Goodnight, not letting her pick up the phone)
  • M :-: "Bond...Bond, are you there? ... Goodnight...?"
  • Bond :-: "She's just coming, Sir!"
  • M :-: "....Goodnight...? Goodnight...? ...GOODNIGHT!!"
  • Bond :-: "Goodnight, sir"
    (Bond hangs up the phone)


  • Sheriff J.W. Pepper :-: "GODDAMN! Little brown waterhog!!"
  • Pepper's Wife :-: "What the matter, J.W. hon?"
  • Sheriff J.W. Pepper :-: "You just try that in my bayou, boy! I'd haul your ass!"


  • Pepper :-: "The bridge is that way! You're not thinking of...."
  • Bond :-: "I shore am, boy! Ever heard of Evel Knievel?"


  • Pepper :-: "What the hell is goin' on?!"


  • Bond :-: "The subject under surveillance is occuping room 602. I'll buy you dinner tonight Goodnight, but first I have a little official business to attend to."
  • Goodnight :-: "Yes, I saw the official business."
  • Scaramanga :-: "Goodnight?! Would I do that to you after two years?"
  • Goodnight :-: "Yes, you bloody well would!"


  • Bond :-: "How's the water?"
  • Chu-Me :-: "Why don't you come in and find out?"
  • Bond :-: "Sounds very tempting, Miss, ah.......?"
  • Chu-Me :-: "Chu-Me."
  • Bond :-: "Really? Well, there's only one small problem...I have no swimming trunks."
  • Chu-Me :-: "Neither have I!"


  • Bond :-: "Sounds a bit old fashioned, doesn't it? Pistols at dawn, that sort of thing."
  • Scaramanga :-: "Indeed it is, Mr. Bond. But it still remains the only true test of gentlemen."
  • Bond :-: "I doubt you qualify on that score. However, I accept."


  • James Bond (Posing as Scaramanga) :-: "And there are very few people who haven't heard of Bond. British Secret Service. 007. License to kill. He's good...even by my standards."


  • Bond :-: "Do you always take a shower with a pistol?"


  • Scaramanga :-: "You see, Mr. Bond, I always thought I liked animals....But I discovered that I like killing people even more."


  • Scaramanga :-: "To us, Mr. Bond. We are the best."
  • Bond :-: "There's a useful four letter word...and you're full of it. When I kill, It's under specific orders from my government. And those I kill are themselves killers."
  • Scaramanga :-: "Come, come, Mr. Bond. You disappoint me. You get as much fulfillment out of killing as I do, so why don't you admit it?"
  • Bond :-: "I admit killing you would be a pleasure."
  • Scaramanga :-: "You should have done that when you first saw me. But then, of course, the English don't consider it sporting to kill in cold blood, do they?"
  • Bond :-: "Don't count on that."


  • M :-: "Charming trinket. Even has my number on it."
  • Scaramanga :-: "Precisely."
  • Bond :-: "Well, obviously it's useless as a bullet. I mean, sir, who would pay a million dollars to have me killed?"
  • M :-: "Jealous husbands! Outraged chefs! Humiliated tailors! The list is endless!"


  • Bond :-: "I believe we had a mutual friend, Bill Fairbanks."
  • Saida :-: "Fairbanks?"
  • Bond :-: "Yes, I am told you were with him when he was rather rudely interrupted."
  • Saida :-: "What a terrible night, I will never forget it."
  • Bond :-: "Did you see who shot him?"
  • Saida :-: "No, I was in his arms, my eyes were closed."
  • Bond :-: "Well, at least he died happy."


  • Saida :-: "Ah!! I've lost my charm!!"
  • Bond :-: "Not from where I'm standing."


  • Bond :-: "How will I recognize him?"
  • Anders :-: "Tall, slim, and dark."
  • Bond :-: "So is my aunt. Anything distinctive about him?"
  • Anders :-: "Yes, but how can I..? He's not like other people...he has three..."
  • Bond :-: "Fascinating anatomical tidbit. But probably the most useless piece of information I've ever heard. Unless of course the Bottoms Up is a strip club, and Scaramanga is performing there."


  • Anders :-: "Why should you trust me?"
  • Bond :-: "I don't. But neither would Mr. Scaramanga trust you when he hears about this little interesting conversation. Who knows, he may even use one of those golden bullets on you. And that would be a pity because the're very expensive."


  • Bond :-: "If Hai-Fat hired Scaramanga, it's highly unlikely he met him personally."
  • M :-: "Why."
  • Bond :-: "In the event of anything going wrong there's nothing to connect the two. That gives me an idea on how to approach him. Q, I'll..uh..need this. ."
  • Q :-: "Really, 007!"
  • Bond :-: "Well, I admit it, it's a little kinky."


  • Anders :-: "Ow! You're hurting my arm!"
  • Bond :-: "I'll break it unless you tell me where those bullets go."


  • Lieutenant Hip :-: "Don't tell me you saw him?"
  • Bond :-: "He even invited me to dinner. He must've found me quite titillating."


  • Hai-Fat :-: "In due time, I shall be laid to rest here in my mausoleum, after a useful happy long life. And I do not intend to allow Mr. Bond to shorten it."


  • Bond :-: "Goodnight, you know I'd much rather have dinner with you."
  • Goodnight :-: "Oh, I understand, James. Please hurry back."
  • Bond :-: "I'll ring as soon as I do. A midnight snack might be just the thing."
  • Goodnight :-: "I'll keep the wine properly chilled."
  • Bond :-: "And everything else warm, I trust."


  • Scaramanga :-: "What do they teach at that school? Ballet dancing?"
  • Hai-Fat :-: "I find nothing remotely amusing about Mr. Bond's escape."
  • Scaramanga :-: "You underestimated him."
  • Hai-Fat :-: "Even my influence doesn't extend into the British Secret Service. I shall lie low too. I don't intend to jeopardize a project in which I invested half my fortuine when it's ready to yield billions."
  • Scaramanga :-: "Where would you hide out?"
  • Hai-Fat :-: "That does not concern you. Take this...return it to the plant and don't leave there without my permission. May I remind you that you work for me. I took you on as a junior partner to be an occasional convenience, nothing more. I did not hire you to interfere in my affairs. Is that clearly understood?"
  • Scaramanga :-: "Yes, very clearly."
  • Hai-Fat :-: "I now regret having even considered employing your services, but that is beside the point. Bond doesn't know you're in Bangkok; he's never seen you. But he knows me. That's the problem.."
  • Scaramanga :-: "That's no problem."


  • Bond :-: "Miss Anders, I didn't recognize you with your clothes on."


  • Bond :-: "Now if Hip doesn't come up with a lead, there's really nothing very much for us to do tonight, or is there?"
  • Goodnight :-: "Oh, darling I'm tempted. But killing a few hours as one of your passing fancies isn't quite my scene."


  • Andrea Anders :-: "Don't you see that you're the only man in the world that could kill him?"
  • Bond :-: "What gives you that idea?"
  • Andrea Anders :-: "The way Scaramanga speaks about you. He even has a likeness of you."
  • Bond :-: "I'm flattered."


  • Scaramanga :-: "When I was a boy I was brought up in a circus. My only real friend was a magnificent African bull elephant. One day, his handler mistreated him and he went berserk. Bleeding, dying, he came and found me, stood on one leg, his best trick, picked me up and put me on his back. The man emptied the gun into his eye... I emptied my stage pistol into his!"
  • Bond :-: "An eye for an eye."
  • Scaramanga :-: "You see, Mr. Bond, I always thought I liked animals. Then I discovered that I liked killing people even more."


  • Scaramanga :-: "My name is Scaramanga, Francisco Scaramanga. I feel I know you, although I never thought we would ever meet. It's a very great pleasure for me, mr. Bond, thanks to Miss Anders."
  • Bond :-: "You have a strange way of showing your gratitude."
  • Scaramanga :-: "A mistress cannot serve two masters."


  • Scaramanga :-: "We have so much in common, Mr. Bond. We have so much to discuss, we may never have this opportunity again. Ours is the loneliest profession, so let us spend a few pleasent hours together."
  • Bond :-: "How can I refuse such a gracious inivitation?"
  • Scaramanga :-: "Splendid, splendid!!"


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